SPEAK!!!

Jo has been babbling a lot lately, well, not so much babbling as yelling vowels at the top of her lungs, spitting everywhere, and then wiggling across the floor in delight. She finds her new power of speech very exciting and won’t stop screaming her satisfaction. I see this as absolutely fascinating. To discover the glorious act of speaking out for the first time must be quite a revealing and enjoyable adventure. She doesn’t do anything without sharing her opinion about it now, and granted I have no idea what she is saying, it is enough to me to know that she is just trying to say something. I am so excited that she wants to share her thoughts with me. I always stop to watch her squeal and shriek in delight and can’t help but screech along. Her enthusiasm for sharing personal thoughts is so inspiring.

I wish I had this kind of glee still. I know I am very fervent when it comes to sharing my thoughts, but I prefer hiding behind a computer screen and typing them out as opposed to yelling them with full lung capacity employed.

Even my silent method of sharing is more than what most people work up to though. This is an absolute shame. Ralph Waldo Emerson said that every single person should write a book in his famous and oh-so-invigorating essay Self Reliance. I couldn’t agree more. So many people are forgotten or underappreciated because they don’t allow anyone to get inside their head. I told my mom that she should write a blog and she said “I have nothing to say.”

Atrocious! Everyone must have at least something to say. The only people who have nothing to say are people that are dead, and that is only because it would be creepy. I believe that every person who has breathed has something to say. The problem with the world today is that everyone is an intellectual introvert. They sit in their own little minds sorting through experience and then keep their epiphanies to themselves.

If there is one person I could get to talk more it would be my father. I ask him a personal question and he usually replies with a one word answer. And most likely it will be “yes” or “no.” Now, if I ask him about government scandal, the stock market, guitars, or tube amplifiers he spews information like the Enterprise fire hydrant on Pioneer Day. Don’t get me wrong, I love bashing crooked officials, being confused by the DOW, and learning how a bunch of wires correctly stuck together makes sound, but if there is one thing I would want to learn it is the story of how my parents fell in love; what my dad’s first thoughts were when he met, Mary VanDusartz, the girl next door. I assume it must be incredibly romantic to marry your child hood sweetheart. They even have plenty of parental opposition and forbidden romance to make the story an absolute sensation. But does anyone ever tell me this? No.

I am afraid that this is the case in most families. I began asking Jordan’s mom about when she met her husband, how he proposed, and why they had so many kids all at once. (Sorry to burst anyone’s bubble, but they weren’t all planned.) It was very interesting, a romance to be recorded. I then shared my new information with Jordan and he seemed completely shocked that his mother had a life before changing his diapers. I asked him, “How come you never asked her this? Weren’t you curious?” He shrugged his shoulders and said, “I just never thought of it.”

President Ucthdorf’s latest conference talk was on slowing down to take notice of the things that matter most. What could matter more than learning to really appreciate and see others for the incredible beings they are? I think the best way to do this is to have nothing more than a simple conversation. Turn off the TV, the radio, and get off facebook (guilty pang). Take time to listen to, (and hopefully record) the people you love most. And don’t just sit there trying to think of something to say about yourself. Really listen, be curious, even a human sloth’s life must have at least one educational story. There is so much to be discovered when it comes to family, friends, neighbors, or the homeless man sitting outside the library.

Share a little love this holiday season, make others feel valued and learn some amazing things yourself. Sit down and listen, whole-heartedly, to a person who has more to share than you both ever realized. And if the person is like my emotional hermit father, you might have to grab a wrench and begin pulling teeth to get down to the good stuff, but don’t give up, persevere and you will prosper. Dive right in with a question like “How do you feel about death?” Okay, maybe not that question because that is a little disturbing, but something better than, “What did you do today?”

The other side of this is that everyone needs to be a little more open. Don’t be so closed off, express yourself, use the wonderful gift of words to really communicate your mind. Don’t give one word answers, which is just lame. A conversation with one word answers is like hot cocoa without the whipped cream and marshmallows, it’s skimping on the good stuff that makes it all oh-so-delectable. Pile on the fluff baby, give some gory detail. Everyone will love you for it.

Make it a goal to have a super intense and revealing conversation with someone. Ooh, they are so fascinating it just makes my intestines want to tap dance.

Two pep phrases to remember – “Listen with Love” and “Speak your mind! (Even if your voice shakes).”

Be like Baby Jo and discover the wonderful wonders of communication. Just make sure you use real words.